When influencer and podcast host Lauren Bosstick (@theskinnyconfidential) publicly attributed her successful pregnancy journey to “manifestation” and staying positive, the internet lit up, and not in a good way.
For many in the TTC community, her comments felt dismissive, even harmful. The idea that a positive mindset alone could cause pregnancy struck a nerve, especially for those who’ve done everything "right" and still struggle.
And we get it.
The last thing anyone trying to conceive wants to hear is that the outcome depends on how “positive” or “aligned” they are especially when the process is so complex, emotional, and, yes, often completely out of your control.
But the conversation sparked something worth exploring: What role does mindset actually play in fertility?
Let’s break it down with compassion, honesty, and science.
1. Positivity Can’t Fix Biology But It Can Help Hormones
Let’s be clear: No amount of optimism can overcome blocked fallopian tubes, low ovarian reserve, severe male factor infertility, or endometriosis.
But your mindset does influence things like:
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Cortisol (stress hormone)
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Inflammation
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Sleep quality
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Hormonal signaling (ovulation + sperm production)
Chronic stress has been shown to delay ovulation, lower progesterone, and reduce sperm motility. This doesn’t mean stress “causes infertility." it means it can be one piece of the puzzle.
Positivity isn’t a magic wand. But reducing stress, cultivating resilience, and supporting your nervous system? That’s biology.
2. Toxic Positivity vs. Resilient Hope
The real problem with statements like Bosstick’s isn’t the belief in mindset, it’s the implication that you failed if it didn’t work.
That’s toxic positivity. It shuts down grief, invalidates struggle, and puts the blame on people who are already carrying enough.
Instead, what helps is resilient hope, the kind that says:
“This is hard, and I still believe in my body.”
“I’m scared, but I’m showing up.”
“It didn’t happen this time, but I haven’t given up.”
Hope doesn’t ignore the hard. It coexists with it.
3. A Positive Mindset, Practiced Like a Daily Ritual
Here’s how positivity actually helps when rooted in science and supported by small, daily actions:
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Breathwork & meditation lower cortisol and increase parasympathetic activity
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Gratitude activates brain regions tied to emotional regulation and sleep
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Daily movement increases endorphins and supports hormone balance
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Therapy or journaling helps process trauma, fear, and loss so they don’t stay stuck in your body
Mindset is a muscle, not a mood.
4. When Optimism Fuels Better Outcomes
Studies show that people who believe in the possibility of pregnancy are more likely to:
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Stick to nutritional and supplement routines
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Advocate for medical support sooner
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Reduce fertility-sabotaging habits (smoking, excessive alcohol, poor sleep)
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Stay committed through setbacks
Optimism isn’t what makes pregnancy happen, but it often helps people do the things that support it.
That’s where Beli for Her and Him come in: nutrient-packed, research-backed support during the most critical 90-day fertility window so your belief has biology behind it.
Final Thoughts: What to Take from the Controversy
You’re allowed to be angry. You’re allowed to feel exhausted, frustrated, or completely undone by this journey. You’re also allowed to hope.
What Lauren Bosstick missed, and what so many people miss, is that fertility isn’t a vibes-only experience. It’s emotional. It’s physical. It’s chemical. It’s real.
And if you want to lean into positivity? Do it your way. On your terms. With science, support, and space for every feeling.
✨ Positivity is not the answer—it’s one tool among many. Support your fertility with the real stuff: nutrients, education, and hope that honors the hard days.
